New York, New York

Well, it is four years and 5 months since the day that changed my life and I want to tell you what made me realise that even though the things that happened to me, wouldn't, if I could choose how my life was going to go - things could have been so much worse and I never thought that I would say that either!

I was telling you that the girls and I were going to go to New York in two weeks time and we were all soooo excited. The girls had heard all my stories of what a fascinating city NY was and how I couldn't wait to show it to them! I had been lucky enough to spend a bit of time in NY but not for over 20 years.

We had saved for at least a year so that we would have some cash to spend, but I didn't want the trip to be wonderful and our everyday life to be boring, so, I was intent on trying to let the girls have a good everyday life as well. We did all sorts of weekend things like playing volleyball with friends, going to the Moonlight cinema Centennial Park or we were lucky enough to be in the draw for and to win some family tickets in the Cahill Express Way on New Years Eve. We were fortunate enough to win a couple of other things like that as well.

The day that I had the stroke was the 17th March 2007, I was intending to drive my eldest daughter to Hoyts, a local Cinema, where she had a part-time job, but of course I had the stroke early enough so that I wasn't driving her to work!!! Can you imagine if I was? I would most likely have hurt us very badly if I didn't actually kill us. What if I had hurt some other innocent bystanders or some other helpless drivers or passengers!! That would have been disastrous. That would have been the first major kerfuffle.

On the 18th of March 2007, the Sydney Harbour Bridge was 75 years old and because that was a big birthday, the bridge was to be closed for several hours to let people like myself and my daughters walk the length of the Bridge from Milsons Point to the Rocks and back if we so desired. Well, if you have ever been on the Bridge when they close it to traffic, you can imagine what it is like! There are 10,000 people who want to walk, run, skateboard, ride bicycles, scooters and rollerblade over the beautiful old lady - can you imagine what it would be like to summon an ambulance to find you in the melee? I don't like your chances! That would have been the second kerfuffle.

Lastly, as I have mentioned several time already, the girls and I were ready to take off for the US or A!! We were already counting down the days and with just a couple of weeks to go, we could hardly sleep with the excitement. Can you imagine what it would have been like? We would have taken off from Sydney International Airport on a Qantas jet bound for Hawaii! It doesn't bear thinking about if I had have had the stroke while we were air-bourne, then I most probably would have died or become 'locked in', which doesn't bear thinking about. The first thing that I think of, is my two gorgeous children flying with a dead mother or  a very sick and unconscious one at the very least. That would have been the third kerfuffle, so, I think I am pretty lucky all things considered!!

Even though I was so angry, afraid and mourning for what I had lost in the way of my previous life, I can't help but think that the 'higher power', chose the least bad of the scenarios to visit upon me.